Mom Spelled Backwards: Everything But the Game Itself

Mother-centric reflections and POLL on Rivertown life and the fun of everything surrounding the Super Bowl.


I can look at football, but I can't see it. I may seem to be staring at the flatscreen high-def TV, but ask me anything about the game – the score, a huge play that just happened, which team is which – and I'm a total blank. 

However, I can talk about the Super Bowl's , the unflattering way football players' butts are packed into shiny tights, my aversion to concussion-seeking sports, how Madonna miraculously blasted back into the innards of the stage or shattered into anti-matter or worm-holed herself into another dimension in the name of World Peace or whatever the heck happened to her. Has anyone seen Madonna since? Should we be worried? 

This may be the first Game in my lifetime, no joke, that I've ever gone out of my way to celebrate. There have been other Super Bowls with the Giants to root for (only a few years ago) and there have been plenty of parties no matter who is competing, but for whatever reason, this was my first. Take my American citizenship away if you must but I think I might prefer that other football: soccer.

As a first-time experience though, I give it a few guacamole-covered thumbs up. Not for the football of course but everything swirling around it. My family gathered in the highly carpeted and very kid-friendly basement of a friend's house. Here we deposited our little ones on a huge blanket covered with bowls of snacks and and watched them gorge themselves on chips and dips for about four hours straight. 

In retrospect, my approach to the evening was certainly too feminine. Breaking the man-food rules (grease, cheese, meat), I brought quiche (with spinach and mushrooms, no less). The drink in my glass was a Bermuda blue in color and from one of those odd-shaped misty bottles labelled Hypnotique. Add splash of orange juice and I was a believer. 

One might assume my allegiances were torn as I am a New Englander (hailing from Connecticut, and not the NYC commuter borough quadrant) from birth. But I've lived and loved and rooted for all things NY ever since I hightailed it out of town after college. Like bagels and chocolate egg creams and pickles, if not exactly football teams. On this night, I was tempted to take my hostess's approach, who was rooting for the Patriots because "Tom Brady is hot." Who? I asked. 

So it was the food and not the tight pants that excited me most, then the drinks, then Madonna, and lastly the commercials, or maybe first the drinks...

Did Madonna's choreography seem super-stiff? For such a yoga expert, she seemed tight. But those stage effects, if that cosmic computerized thing even was a stage, were hard to grasp. And that man bouncing near her on an elastic cable? Words can't describe. 

Alas, my true loyalties took hold at the end of the third quarter, when, rather than watch the end of the game, I whispered to my husband that it was time for us to get our weary and chip-bloated children home to bed. Putting the kids to bed always beats anything.

naomi vladeck February 07, 2012 at 01:32 PM
Hilarious! Thanks for the morning giggle Krista. My husband went to a meatless super bowl party and was sorely disappointed. (Although he himself brought Thai shrimp wraps, so who was he to complain?!) I approximated a Guac dip for my daughter who was charged-up for the big day by kids at school (and her Giant obsessed bus driver) - she came home changing Go Go Giants! for a week prior to Sunday night. My son and I tossed a deflated football around the living room before he asked to watch Phineas and Ferb. We are not a sports following family, but we did our best, albeit in separate locations for the evening, to nod to the tradition and submit to the tide. Go go giants! Naomi
Krista Madsen February 07, 2012 at 02:24 PM
Meatless party does sound a bit sacrilegious!
Anna Mayor February 07, 2012 at 02:51 PM
Ha, love it Krista. Pablo and I will go further, as musicians and completely out of the football loop, to say that we worked for 5 hours straight on a musical project and completely missed the super bowl altogether, and the fantastic party that you talked about!!!! No one on earth would believe that I didn't even know who was in the super bowl until I heard it on Monday morning on the way to the city announcing the winner. We're more South American-style Futbol folks, I guess you can say. The rest of my family, however, disowns me when they hear such blasphemy :) Cheers to the spinach quiche :)
Krista Madsen February 07, 2012 at 02:53 PM
We missed you! Hurrah Futbol!


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